Category Archives: Doomsday survival tips
Zombie Questions
QUESTION:
a) Baseball Bat b) Machete c) Shotgun d) Liquid Nitrogen e) Wood-Chipper.
The BASEBALL BAT (aka: Louisville Slugger) is great for that up-close and personal touch. Whether you use wood or aluminum, be advised, after a good head-bashing, you might experience a temporary tingling or numbness in your wrists.
The MACHETE, a cross between an axe and a knife, is a good multi-use tool. Downside: Constant practice and blade-sharpening can seem like chores. QUICK TIP: If you must have a machete, get a Kukri (central Asia) or the Tapanga (Africa).
On the other hand, for elegance, precision, and stealthy silence, nothing beats the Japanese Katana sword – think Highlander.
The SHOTGUN. It gives new meaning the the term: “Scatterbrained”. But seriously folks, what’s not to like about a pump-action, Mossberg 500 – it’s an American Classic. Downside: Shotgun blasts are messy and very loud.
LIQUID NITROGEN. Yes, it’s very “out-of-the box” thinking but it’s also very complicated and it wouldn’t actually kill a zombie as much as slow it down.
The WOOD-CHIPPER. Granted, they’re not cheap and coaxing the undead inside one can be tricky. On the other hand, nothing is more satisfying then seeing the total (million tiny bit) annihilation of a zombie. Oh yeah, Zed is dead.
Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse From the CDC
A Brief History of Zombies
We’ve all seen at least one movie about flesh-eating zombies taking over (my personal favorite is Resident Evil
), but where do zombies come from and why do they love eating brains so much? The word zombie comes from Haitian and New Orleans voodoo origins. Although its meaning has changed slightly over the years, it refers to a human corpse mysteriously reanimated to serve the undead. Through ancient voodoo and folk-lore traditions, shows like the Walking Dead were born.
A couple dressed as zombies – Danny Zucco and Sandy Olsson from the movie Grease walking in the annual Toronto Zombie Walk.
In movies, shows, and literature, zombies are often depicted as being created by an infectious virus, which is passed on via bites and contact with bodily fluids. Harvard psychiatrist Steven Schlozman wrote a (fictional) medical paper on the zombies presented in Night of the Living Dead and refers to the condition as Ataxic Neurodegenerative Satiety Deficiency Syndrome caused by an infectious agent. The Zombie Survival Guide identifies the cause of zombies as a virus called solanum. Other zombie origins shown in films include radiation from a destroyed NASA Venus probe (as in Night of the Living Dead), as well as mutations of existing conditions such as prions, mad-cow disease,measles and rabies.
The rise of zombies in pop culture has given credence to the idea that a zombie apocalypse could happen. In such a scenario zombies would take over entire countries, roaming city streets eating anything living that got in their way. The proliferation of this idea has led many people to wonder “How do I prepare for a zombie apocalypse?”
Well, we’re here to answer that question for you, and hopefully share a few tips about preparing for real emergencies too!
Some of the supplies for your emergency kit
Better Safe than Sorry
So what do you need to do before zombies…or hurricanes or pandemics for example, actually happen? First of all, you should have an emergency kit in your house. This includes things like water, food, and other supplies to get you through the first couple of days before you can locate a zombie-free refugee camp (or in the event of a natural disaster, it will buy you some time until you are able to make your way to an evacuation shelter or utility lines are restored). Below are a few items you should include in your kit, for a full list visit the CDC Emergency page.
- Water (1 gallon per person per day)
- Food (stock up on non-perishable items that you eat regularly)
- Medications (this includes prescription and non-prescription meds)
- Tools and Supplies (utility knife, duct tape, battery powered radio, etc.)
- Sanitation and Hygiene (household bleach, soap, towels, etc.)
- Clothing and Bedding (a change of clothes for each family member and blankets)
- Important documents (copies of your driver’s license, passport, and birth certificate to name a few)
- First Aid supplies (although you’re a goner if a zombie bites you, you can use these supplies to treat basic cuts and lacerations that you might get during a tornado orhurricane)
Once you’ve made your emergency kit, you should sit down with your family and come up with an emergency plan. This includes where you would go and who you would call if zombies started appearing outside your door step. You can also implement this plan if there is a flood, earthquake, or other emergency.
Family members meeting by their mailbox. You should pick two meeting places, one close to your home and farther away
- Identify the types of emergencies that are possible in your area. Besides a zombie apocalypse, this may include floods, tornadoes, or earthquakes. If you are unsure contact your local Red Cross chapter for more information.
- Pick a meeting place for your family to regroup in case zombies invade your home…or your town evacuates because of a hurricane. Pick one place right outside your home for sudden emergencies and one place outside of your neighborhood in case you are unable to return home right away.
- Identify your emergency contacts. Make a list of local contacts like the police, fire department, and your local zombie response team. Also identify an out-of-state contact that you can call during an emergency to let the rest of your family know you are ok.
- Plan your evacuation route. When zombies are hungry they won’t stop until they get food (i.e., brains), which means you need to get out of town fast! Plan where you would go and multiple routes you would take ahead of time so that the flesh eaters don’t have a chance! This is also helpful when natural disasters strike and you have to take shelter fast.
Never Fear – CDC is Ready
Get a Kit, Make a Plan, Be Prepared
If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. This assistance might include consultation, lab testing and analysis, patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control (includingisolation and quarantine). It’s likely that an investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals: determine the cause of the illness, the source of the infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further cases, and how patients can best be treated. Not only would scientists be working to identify the cause and cure of the zombie outbreak, but CDC and other federal agencies would send medical teams and first responders to help those in affected areas (I will be volunteering the young nameless disease detectives for the field work).
To learn more about what CDC does to prepare for and respond to emergencies of all kinds, visit: http://emergency.cdc.gov/cdc/orgs_progs.asp
To learn more about how you can prepare for and stay safe during an emergency visit:http://emergency.cdc.gov/
Join the CDC Zombie Task Force! The CDC Foundation, a non-profit partner of CDC is offering Zombie Task Force t-shirts (click on the picture to find out more). Proceeds go to benefit disaster relief efforts and other important health programs. Get yours before they’re gone…
Are you prepared? Tell us…
Have you begun preparing for a zombie apocalypse? Or maybe you have been preparing for a more realistic threat like hurricanes or the next flu season? Tell us about what you are doing to prepare! Enter our video contest here:http://prepare.challenge.gov
Zombie Apocalypse Teachable Moments – Straight From the CDC
Rule #1 – Make a pit stop, fill up before it’s too late
Siphoning gas…with your mouth? Gross. If you remember to always keep your tank at least half full, you can avoid having the lingering taste of petrol linger in your mouth and have enough fuel to get outta Dodge before impending disaster strikes.
Rule #2 – First aid kit, never leave home without it
We felt T-Dog’s pain when he ripped open his arm on a rusty car door while trolling the wreckage and siphoning gas. We’re assuming that you’re not scavenging for supplies on the freeway or hiding under abandoned cars to avoid walkers, but the key take away here is to always have a first kit on hand. By doing so, you could avoid having to stop the bleeding with a grimy towel and some duct tape like T-Dog did…not exactly sterile supplies. T-Dog’s luck improves when Daryl offers his brother’s stash of anti-biotics (not something the CDC recommends!) and the group stumbles upon a farm conveniently inhabited by folks versed in the medical arts. Herschel’s wife is able to stitch up T-Dogs arm (now oozing puss) and prevent further infection. Always have a first aid kit on hand. If you’re really smart you’ll keep one at home, in your car, and at work. T-Dog could have avoided a lot of pain and suffering if he’d followed this simple rule.
Rule #3 – Clean water is zombie-free water
Zombie down the well? You might want to find a new water source. One of the most gruesome scenes of the season was when the group found a water-logged zombie in Herschel’s well, nasty right? Contaminated water is a common concern after a disaster, zombie related or other. After an emergency, especially flooding, run-off containing livestock waste, human sewage, chemicals, and other contaminants can taint water used for drinking, cooking, or cleaning. Our suggestion to Rick and his crew – don’t drink the water! If you’re ever concerned about the quality of your water after a flood or other emergency check with local authorities about water safety, you can also make water safe by boiling, adding disinfectants, or filtering.
Planting Your Survival Potato Crop
Potatoes. Nothing is humbler than a potato. But, potatoes have saved many a person from starvation. When potatoes fail, many a society has dipped into hard times, see The Irish Potato Famine.
Potatoes are a great SHTF crop. Generally healthy, easy to grow, they can survive locusts and temperature swings and even drought if you’ve got the right variety. It’s not too late in most places to plant a little potato crop. I got mine in last week, and wanted to share some tips, for those embarking on potatoes for the first time.
The thing to remember when you’re planting is that the seed potato will grow new potatoes above itself. That is to say, you need to get the seed potato deep, so that there’s room to grow above it. I accomplish this by hoeing a trench to put my potatoes in. About 8-12 inches deep.
I put the sprouting seed potatoes in the trench, one every 8-12 inches. Put the sprouting eyes pointing up. Then I use SOME of the dirt from the trench to cover the potatoes. I also put some straw on top of the dirt that’s covering the spuds. The straw helps keep moisture levels even, and help keeps the light away from the developing potatoes. If sunlight gets to your growing potatoes, they will turn green, which means they are now slightly poisonous, and containing a bitter alkaloid. You can still eat them, if slightly poisoned is better than slightly dead. The plants need at least 6 hours of sun a day to grow a good crop. So, it’s a bit of a balancing act. Also, avoid growing potatoes in ground that was used for legumes the previous year as these fix nitrogen into the soil which will cause the potatoes to grow extensive haulm (the upper part of the plant) at the expense of the tubers.
When the potato plants are about 12 inches tall, you will need to hoe the remaining soil from the trench over the base of the plants. This is called hilling up. You want to bury a few joints of the haulm in dirt, to encourage a heavy tuber set. This also helps to cover the growing potatoes, (remember, they are forming ABOVE the seed potato, and UNDER ground.) I usually just pile the dirt on top of the straw, and add a fresh layer of straw to the top when I’ve got the dirt mounded up. That nice layer of straw in the middle will help drainage in the soil, as potatoes will rot if they have wet feet.
Potatoes will reach maturity in 3 to 4 months, depending on conditions and variety. Later crops tend to store better in cold storage. You’ll typically get between 8 and 14 pounds of potatoes per pound you plant; it’ll take about 8 to 10 lbs of seed potatoes per every 100 feet of potatoes you plant.
Any potato growers out there? I’m growing Kennebec and Yukon Gold, what do you have in the ground>
10 doomsday preps that will get you killed
First things first: You need a firearm. The time for “common sense gun control” went out the window the second grandpa came back from the afterlife to make a sandwich out of your face. No matter what your political stance was before the uprising, you fucking love the Second Amendment now. You want the biggest, shiniest, loudest monstrosity possible. If there’s a gun that shoots a thousand bullets a second; that’s great. If there’s one that shoots a thousand flaming bullets a second; even better! If there’s a gun that shoots out other guns that all fire thousands of flaming bullets in mere seconds–like some sort of pyramid scheme comprised entirely of shredding death infernos–well, that would be just dandy. But even if you already have the god-king of firearms at your disposal, you’re still not ready. You need to arm everybody in your group, you need spares just in case and you need ammo. In short, you need to get to the gun store.
The only problem being: So does everybody else.
The closest gun shop to your house is also the closest gun shop to a thousand other people’s houses, and at least a few dozen of them are going to get there before you. Assuming that the place isn’t clean out–probably because the shop is either locked down like a fortress, or because the owners are barricaded inside and would rather like to keep their livelihood and defensive measures, thanks–you still need to get your arsenal. See, owners of gun stores tend to like guns, and people that like guns not only generally want to keep them, but are also quite capable of using them.
“You can have my gun… when you come down to my place of business and ask politely. I’ve got a lot, take one!”
Now you and a thousand other people are on the outside of a suburban fortress, hurling “pretty pleases” at a half-insane, heavily-armed, trained marksmen inside. Not only are you probably not coming away from the gun store with a shiny new weapon; you’d be lucky to get out of there without an impromptu sunroof installed in your skull.