Category Archives: Zombie Survival
Dept. of Homeland Security Warns of Impending Zombie Apocalypse
If there’s one thing Americans love, it’s the zombie apocalypse. I don’t know why, really. Although some people think that it would be cool to blow the heads off the undead and attempt to survive in a brutal post-apocalyptic landscape, most people would get their fat asses either gnawed on by zombies or shot by a survivalist looking for supplies. The harsh reality is that most people wouldn’t survive the zombie apocalypse, but we can keep dreaming that we’re the exception – we’re all Rick from The Walking Dead.
This month is National Preparedness Month, and the Department of Homeland Security is capitalizing on the never-ending zombie craze to make people start thinking about what they would do in the event of a disaster.
According to the AP, DHS is urging citizens to prepare for the zombie apocalypse. “The Zombies are coming!” they say.
Except they’re not. At least not right now. DHS’s message is that if you’re prepared for a zombie attack, you’ll likely be prepared for a hurricane, pandemic, earthquake, or terrorist attack. That’s because all of those events have something in common – the need for shelter, food, water, etc. DHS wants emergency planners across the country to use the “zombie attack” trope to get people into the disaster preparedness mindset.
Of course, this isn’t the first time that a government organization has mentioned the z word to citizens. Last year, the Centers for Disease Control actually acknowledged zombies and released their own zombie preparedness guide.
Here’s what the CDC says would happen, on a governmental response level:
If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. This assistance might include consultation, lab testing and analysis, patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control (including isolation and quarantine).
It’s likely that an investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals: determine the cause of the illness, the source of the infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further cases, and how patients can best be treated. Not only would scientists be working to identify the cause and cure of the zombie outbreak, but CDC and other federal agencies would send medical teams and first responders to help those in affected areas (I will be volunteering the young nameless disease detectives for the field work).
Even though the CDC clearly has a plan, they officially denied the known existence of zombies after a rash of cannibalism stories hit the news earlier this year.
If you have the money and truly wish to prepare for the zombie apocalypse, you can’t go wrong with this kit for the 1%.
Fly turns honeybees into little zombies
Latest woe is horrific, but is not what’s crashing bee populations
zombie bee
A researcher at Oregon State University has reported Oregon’s first documented case of a “zombie” fly infecting a honeybee, but he doubts that the parasite at the moment poses a threat to the bee, which is a vital pollinator of some of the state’s key crops.
Ramesh Sagili, a honeybee specialist with the OSU Extension Service, stumbled upon a belly-up bee on a sidewalk under a street light on campus in Corvallis one morning in late July, according to a press release Tuesday from OSU. He placed it in a vial in his lab, and four days later seven maggots crawled out of the bee’s neck. Almost three weeks after that, one matured into an Apocephalus borealis fly, commonly called a zombie fly because of the disoriented behavior it is suspected of causing the bees to exhibit at night.
The finding comes amid rising concern about the health of honeybees, which have been hit by a mysterious phenomenon called colony collapse disorder in which adult honeybees disappear from a hive, either entirely or in large numbers. It came to light in late 2006 when beekeepers on the East Coast began to see their honeybee colonies dwindle. The disorder has since spread to other states. A cause has not been determined, but suspects include mites, viruses, malnutrition, pesticides, a lack of genetic diversity, and stress that results from commercial hives being trucked around the country to pollinate crops.
Sagili doubts that the fly is playing a role in the widespread die-off of honeybees, which are crucial pollinators for various Oregon crops, including blueberries, pears, cherries, apples, clover, cranberries and vegetable seeds.
“It’s a stretch to say the fly is correlated to colony collapse disorder,” he said. “At this point, I don’t think it’s a threat. I don’t think it’s at the level where it can depopulate hives in large numbers.”
Earlier this year in a journal article, researchers in California became the first to document that the fly attacks honeybees. They discovered the parasite in honeybees in California and South Dakota, the only states besides Oregon where fly-infected honeybees, or ZomBees, have been reported.
The fly is known to parasitize bumblebees but little is known about its impact on them in Oregon, said Sujaya Rao, an entomologist at OSU.
Sagili hypothesizes that the fly is just now being found in honeybees because it may be trying to branch out from its other hosts when they’re not available. He added that although honeybees are widely studied, it’s possible that scientists just never saw the parasite because they usually preserve their collected bees in alcohol, which would kill the larvae and keep them from popping out.
The brownish-red fly lays its eggs inside the bees and is smaller than a fruit fly, is native to North America and has been found in Canada and states including Alaska, Georgia, Maine, Minnesota, New Mexico and New York, said Brian Brown, the curator of entomology at the Natural History Museum of Los Angeles County and an expert on the parasitic fly.
Brown said the fly has been in Oregon for thousands of years, but it just never has been found in a honeybee in the state until no
ZOMBIE OUTBREAK – Face-chewing victim speaks out in police interview
MIAMI — A homeless man whose face was mostly chewed off in a bizarre assault 
alongside a busy South Florida highway told police that his attacker “just ripped me to ribbons.”
In a recorded interview with investigators, Ronald Poppo said the man who approached him initially seemed friendly. Then the man, Rudy Eugene, seemed to become angry about something that had happened on Miami Beach, where thousands were partying through the Memorial Day weekend.
“For a while he was acting nice. Then he got flustered. He probably remembered something that happened on the beach and was not happy about it,” Poppo told investigators in the interview that was taped July 19 and first reported Wednesday by Miami news station WFOR-TV (http://cbsloc.al/OQgwOt).
Poppo said Eugene then “turned berserk” and attacked with his bare hands, screaming that both men would die.
“He just ripped me to ribbons. He chewed up my face. He plucked out my eyes. Basically, that’s all there is to say about it,” Poppo said.
Poppo, 65, remains in a long-term care facility after losing an eye, his eyebrows, his nose and parts of his forehead and right cheek in the May 26 attack. His other eye was severely damaged.
Doctors at Jackson Memorial Hospital’s Ryder Trauma Center said last month that Poppo was in good spirits, talking and walking around, but would need several more surgeries before he could explore the options for reconstructing his face.
Eugene, 31, was shot and killed by a Miami police officer during the attack on the Macarthur Causeway just off downtown Miami. Lab tests found only marijuana in Eugene’s system, but no other drugs or alcohol.
Poppo said Eugene had said something about not being able “to score,” adding that Eugene “must have been souped up on something.”
In the police interview, Poppo sometimes seems confused about some details of the attack. He described Eugene wearing a green shirt and getting out of a car, but surveillance video recorded from security cameras on The Miami Herald building showed a naked Eugene walking up to Poppo as cars and bicyclists zipped by. Poppo was reclining on the sidewalk near the parking garage where he lived.
Police asked Poppo whether he provoked Eugene.
“What could provoke an attack of that type?” Poppo said. “I didn’t curse at the guy or say anything mean or nasty.”
Poppo also thanked the police for saving his life, saying the officer who shot Eugene arrived in the nick of time.
Zombie Research Society Founder Matt Mogk Talks Zombie Survival Tips
For help with our recent feature, Seven Zombie-Proof World Landmarks, we went straight to Matt Mogk, founder and head of the Zombie Research Society and the author of Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Zombies. What he told us might just save you from becoming zombie food.
First, says Mogk, evaluate a shelter on the DSM scale, for Defensibility, Sustainbility, and Mobility. He also points out that dying of dehydration should be your biggest concern (aside from, you know, getting your limbs torn off by a zombie). If you get trapped somewhere without water, you could be dead within three days.
So where is Mogk heading when the zombies rise from the dead? Nipton, California, a small solar-powered town that can generate its own energy, produce food, and is isolated enough to defend.
If you can’t make it out to the Mojave Desert town, Mogk suggests heading to the nearest cemetery in an emergency: Zombies aren’t going to rise from graves (are they?), and no one thinks to go to a cemetery even on a normal day, so there won’t be many other people around.
Mogk says that “people make zombies,” so you should get away from crowds at all costs. In other words, your “brilliant” plan to head to the nearest mall or Costco is foolish because everyone else is going to go there. “People get trampled to death on Black Friday over saving money on flatscreen TVs,” notes Mogk, so imagine the panic during a zombie outbreak.
The Walking Dead may have been thoroughly mocked for sending its characters to an isolated farm for its second season, but Mogk says it’s actually a good spot to hide out since it’s far away from other people. Plus, you can grow food and have access to water.
8 Tips For Surviving A Zombie Apocalypse
Here at What Culture we consider ourselves to be experts in many different things. Sure we have massive brains filled with the latest gaming news, movie tidbits and comic book geekery but did you know that we’re also the leading experts on surviving a zombie apocalypse? Darn tooting we are! In fact, if the Government called upon us to protect you lovely people from having your brains eaten by your dead grandma we’d know exactly what to do. So it seems only fair that we share this information with you – our dear readers – just in case we’re a bit busy helping the Governments of the world sort out their living dead problems.
So let’s begin with the basics.
1. How Likely is A Zombie Outbreak
According to the BBC, researchers in Canada concluded that unless a Zombie outbreak was dealt with quickly and aggressively it would in fact lead to the downfall of civilisation. You see, people have actually been funded to look into this kind of ‘eventuallity’ under the pretence that the idea of an outbreak of Zombieism works in much the same way as any other alien infection and thus the research can help prepare for such a real life scenario. Personally we think this is all part of the Government’s attempts to keep Joe Public in the dark. Research is being undertaken to prepare for Zombies, like it or not.
If you’re still unsure about the reality of Zombies then just take a look at nature and you’ll see that such infections already exist within the animal world. Take Toxoplasmosa Gondii for example. It lives inside the body of the common Rat, but the only place it can bread is inside the intestines of a Cat so it takes over the brain of Mr Rat and makes him get himself eaten. The parasite actually programmes the Rat, much like a similar parasite could programme the human brain. In fact over half the world’s population is infected by this little bugger already. What if it were to evolve? Scary thought, hu?
Need more examples? How about Haiti, home of the term Zombie. People there were infected with an acute neurotoxin that actually wiped the memories of the victims, left them in a barely conscious state and caused them to shuffle around performing basic daily tasks such as eating. There are books and documentaries on this – and we don’t mean ones called Zombie Flesheaters. And if you’re STILL not convinced then have a look at the symptoms of Mad Cow’s Disease – muscle spasms, dementia, rage, changes in gait – it’s all there in black and white for the sceptics out there. All that’s keeping us safe at the moment is the fact that none of the aforementioned causes have taken hold … yet.
2. Know Your Zombies
Like with most things there are different types of Zombie. As we haven’t been face to face with any as of yet it’s safe to assume that any of the weird shit you’ve seen on TV or in a video game could actually be true. However, tradition dictates a certain type of Zombie – at least in the first instance. Who knows if they can evolve or adapt over time?
Here’s what we do know:
1. Zombies can be both the reanimated corpses of the already dead OR any living thing that has been bitten and thus transformed.
2. Zombies are slow. Any notion that they may be able to run should be disregarded. Sure, if you’ve just been turned then you may have use of your full leg muscles a while but rigor mortis reaches maximum stiffness after 12 hours, so beyond that we should assume the creature cannot run.
3. The brain of a Zombie is not entirely dead. It continues to operate at 0.5%. No Zombie will ever win a pub quiz then – but they are brighter than most of the people who go on Jeremy Kyle’s TV show.
4. The primary weapons of a Zombie are it’s hands/claws and it’s teeth. You’re not likely to change sides if you get scratched but a bite will damn sure bring about a sudden case of death. Well, more like a slow agonising case actually.
5. The original cause of a Zombie plague grossly affects how us humans can be turned. For example, if the cause is airborne then you might become a Zombie just by breathing. Likewise the original Zombies may just be reanimated corpses and you could be turned by a bite – the transference of saliva which carries a parasite etc. Or in some cases you may already be carrying whatever it is that turns you (like in The Walking Dead) and when you die you will become a member of the undead without ever coming into contact with one. Let’s just hope that if/when Zombies walk the Earth the only way for you to be turned is by a bite. At least that gives you more of a fighting chance at survival.